And while I was looking at this Jaguar V-64 convertible, I heard this little voice saying, “Um, aren’t you the guy who’s spent the last 10 years going around preaching about air quality, and the need to replace the kind of urban design that favors cars and trucks and moves to something more humane, with a focus on pedestrians, bicyclists, and transit choices, in an environment of urban villages where many of the amenities of daily life are within walking distance?”

Oh, yeah. That. Morality. My morality.

Do I need a car at all? I know a few people who live without cars. But me? No, I have to have a car, and I can give you a lot of reasons. A lot of them. Believe me. Very good and rational reasons.

Given that I need a car, don’t I really need a truck in a city where more than half the people drive trucks all the time? Not a serious question for somebody in the smart growth-environment business, I’m afraid.

Having re-established that I am more moral and more responsible than the majority of people in the region, I return to my dilemma. I’m driving around the city, paying no attention to my driving, and thinking that the Mercedes Compressor looks pretty good, as does the Audi sports car. Even the new Honda Sports car looks cool. Every now and then I see a 1957 Thunderbird, which is what I really want, or a 57 Corvette.

Probably those are a little impractical, probably be better off in the Jaguar convertible, or really, the bigger Mercedes convertible.

But after a few days I realize those are all wrong too, and for the highest of reasons: I can’t afford any of them.

For a while I focus on the Audi A6, but it turns out to get lousy gas mileage, an issue that is beginning to nag at me. Not to mention the cost, which is still over my head.

No question I’m looking at pretty fancy cars. Right now I drive a 12-year-old Lexus (It’s just a little one! I bought it used!) and I’ve really liked this car. Leather seats. Great stereo. Careful design. And, uh, 14 miles to the gallon… But I didn’t know that when I bought it! I thought, hey, it’s a Toyota, it’ll get great mileage. Wrong. And I realize with a gasp that I have to worry about gas mileage.

Worry about it? No, no, that’s the whole thing, isn’t it? That’s the bottom line, of course. So what’s the best mileage-getter? It’s the Honda Insight, and the Toyota Prius. And these cars, they may be great in the technology department, but these cars are dorky. I can’t drive a dweebmobile!

All the time, my wife is pointing at her Honda Civic, which gets, I don’t know, 35 or 40 miles to the gallon. And, you know, it’s red. So next thing you know we’re at a Honda dealer and a salesman is bubbling in the back seat of this little brown Civic with a 5-speed transmission. “Oh oh oh! What a car! So much value, why, used Hondas are so precious they cost more than new ones! Be careful! This car is very fast! Oooh, very powerful, whew, feel that acceleration!” And the car, which has a 127-horsepower 4-cylinder engine, is going pphhhhhh.

But what I’m really noticing is that it has cloth seats. Uh oh. And the stereo - not that great.

So is that it? Am I going to have find a way to see my next car as some sort of transportation vehicle, some sort of mechanical tool, some utility thing? With cloth seats? Which reminds of my son the principled vegetarian who would just love to hear me whining about wanting leather seats, a whole cow’s worth to wallow in as I drive around the city.

And now I realize I am in deep personal trouble here. What to do? More about this modern moral drama next month.